@Prero22: "I'm so sorry", I go around whispering to people who've just woken up from a coma.
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@dorsalstream: DISCIPLES: Why did it take you 3 days to come back from the dead? JESUS: [remembering all the times he hit snooze] All the praying and stuff.
@druuuck: *Friend sees my knuckle tats* F: 'MMA4LYFE,' really? *I put my fists by my English prof's 'OXFORDCO' knuckle tats* *we start break dancing*
@ashleyn1cole: WTF NEW YORK?!?!?! I carried a paper grocery bag with a baguette in it for BLOCKS and NOBODY FELL IN LOVE WITH ME.