@WSiefford: I'm so sorry my pet rock attacked you. Its just he really hates arrogant douche bags. Thank god he only hit your face.
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@Sassafrantz: [male bank teller gives my niece a sucker] Me: What do you say? Niece: My aunt's single, do you have money? Me: lol how embarrassing! Do u?
@TheBoydP: *Wife sends me a link* *I click on link* *Buy whatever's at the link* *wait for delivery* ~Christmas shopping for my wife