@flamingo_poet: I'm so tired of having to think, "What would a normal person do here?"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@forcemajeure40: Apparently when I'm at Olive Garden I'm family. So why did they call the cops when I left without paying? My family never makes me pay.
@the_gramble: Coworker: Do you have good taste in music? Me: I can only taste things I put in my mouth Both of us thinking: I work with an idiot
@3sunzzz: [bed] M: "I'm freezing." H: *rolls over, adjusts pillows and blankets, wraps around me* [1 min later] M: "I'm hot, get off me."
@Jennifergr8: Someone just asked my son what other type of fish do you like then? He replied....chicken. Thank god he is good looking.