@BritXNic: I'm sorry I committed a home invasion but somebody had to do something about those carpets.
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@ThePocketJustin: No matter how often I scream METALLICA in the poolside DJ's face I don't think he's going to play them. Here come the police they'll help me
@ericsshadow: My son asked me to explain women to him, so I bought him an XBOX game for his Playstation.
@mrjohndarby: Father in law: How are you preparing for the future? Me: I buy Monopoly games in case one day Monopoly money becomes legal tender.