@BritXNic: I'm sorry I committed a home invasion but somebody had to do something about those carpets.
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@fillthevacuum: Someone gave me a star as a gift. I'm planning on sprucing it up with some planets and asteroids and using it as a summer vacation spot.
@david8hughes: [describing criminal to sketch artist] "No, no his nose was a bit more avant-garde than that. His eyes suggested he'd lost a ladder."