@jctwritesstuff: I'm sorry I said your baby looks like a hairless hamster. But in my defense, you shouldn't have had a hairless hamster for a baby.
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@PaperWash: Commissioner: we'll need to stay in touch Batman: ok Commissioner: this stealth communication device will- Batman: LETS USE A GIANT SKY LAMP
@Jenn_H_Scott: 7yo: Why can't I have coffee? Me: It'll make u even more energetic than u already are 7: But u drink it all the time& u never have energy!
@Pork_Chop_Hair: Hell is just you and your dog as he takes revenge for all the times you shouted "Squirrel!" when there was no squirrel.
@vikkaroni: When I say ditto after someone tells me they love me, it doesn't mean I love them. It means I love me too.