@Jandalize: I'm sorry your wife touches the elf on the shelf more than you.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ThisLocalHater: I am in my truest form when the food comes at a restaurant and I side-eye plates, suspicious that everyone got more fries than I did.
@chrissyteigen: Does the baby have access to my ribs? It feels like they're bars and she's an old timey prisoner with a tin mug
@IvoryGazelle: Tiger: *after killing several zoo animals* forget what you saw here...or you're next Gazelle: ok Monkey: ok Zebra: ok Elephant: oh no