@ericsshadow: I'm starting to regret my "2015 FOREVER" tattoo.
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@MichaelTrying: Yet another "No DMs" bio. All this civil rights progress but bigotry against Dungeon Masters is still tolerated.
@usermcuserface: Agent: I keep telling you, nobody is making a movie with pirates or elves right now! Orlando Bloom: (through tears) Are you sure?
@JasonLastname: [sitting at bar next to cute woman] You remind me of my late wife. "Oh I'm so sorry." Don't be, *looks across restaurant* there she is now.
@MartaEffing: Tonight's Menu: Gourmet pork blend sausage with organic tomato reduction, served on warm split bread rolls. AKA: Hot dogs with ketchup.