@samalmightysam: I'm telling you to go to hell because I'm poor. If I was rich I would kill you.
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@goldengateblond: Why do people always make such a fuss over how much a newborn weighs? It's a baby, not a stash of heroin.
@Reverend_Scott: Love is that feeling you get when you meet that special someone who hates all of your friends.
@WhatsHerFace33: If your wife says "what would you do without me?" "Live happily ever after" is NOT the correct answer. Brrrr it's cold in this doghouse :(