@jferg1616: I'm the kind of guy who brings his phone charger to the party.
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@Sickayduh: SON: what ya reading? DAD: a huge book on podiatry SON: how long is it? DAD: it's about a foot
@SergioValenCo: I hope I die doing something extreme like climbing Mt. Everest or telling a woman I don't like her new haircut.
@jackiembouvier: Put a kid in a lake or a river and they never want to come out. Turn on a shower and it's like you're blasting them with nuclear waste.
@JediGigi: Me: Nice biker jacket. You ride? Him: No Me: So you're a liar? Him: Me: Him: Nice yoga pants Me: That jacket looks so awesome on you!