@shariv67: I'm the most bashful person in the world, until you get me on the dance floor. Then I become the most bashful newborn giraffe in the world.
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@retardedwriter: If u think ur parents did nothing for you, remember Jackie Shrof named his son Tiger and Bappi Da named his son Bappa. Respect your parents
@Baldylockzzz: Nothing says " My divorce didn't go as planned " quite like the guy with grocery bags hanging on the sides of his bicycles handlebars
@MatCro: ME: I'm off to that meeting BOSS: Forget something? M: Yes! [kisses boss gently on forehead] B: I meant your pen [whispers] but thank you
@DillDoes: [god inventing animals] okay here's a new one. It's an umbrella "okay" made out of jello "alright" and it electrocutes things "you're drunk"