@theDanLawler: I'm thinking about getting an arm tattooed on my snake.
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@Beardson: These people are putting up 'Lost Parrot' signs for the sake of their kids, but you'd think they'd place them higher for other birds to see.
@iinkedZombie: I'm sorry, I’m about to lose you because I’m driving through a tunnel underwater in a canyon on an airplane while hanging up the phone.
@CakeThrottle: I ordered my latte wrong at that new gypsy coffee place and now my shadow is a horse shadow