@Screwoff315: I'm tired of this long distance relationship! Time to move the liquor cabinet to the living room!
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@maughammom: The very first thing my 3yo daughter said to me this morning was "I know how to start a fire!" so nothing you guys say today can scare me.
@KKenuz: my beloved wife was on the second earth as it detached from our earth and drifted forever #FirstWorldProblems
@FrizerkaSandra: There is nothing in the world that lowers your IQ faster than trying to use someone else's coffee machine.