@Lisa_Laughs_: I'm torn between having 'wish you were here' or 'look behind you' engraved on my headstone.
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@preawsaurus: the racists in this town are so proud of their lack of pigmentation you'd think they had actually chose it themselves :)
@GuyAdvisor: Me: You know, talking to yourself doesn't make you crazy. Me: I know, right? Me: It's a sign of advanced intelligence. Me: High-5. Me: Word.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [NASA press conf] "good news: we found a cat on Mars" REPORTER: & the bad news? "[recalls Curiosity rover running it over] uh it's sleeping"
@markleggett: Stop complaining about the length of the Hobbit movies. Plays are 17 hours long. School plays are twice that.