@markleggett: I'm using an old Indian trick in order to wake myself up early: Eating several large curries right before bed.
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@LackOfShame: Have fun, but be careful. Your sister was vacuumed up last week, and yesterday your cousin was killed with a shoe. - spider moms, probably
@i_love_fudge: Somewhere in a parallel universe, I hope there's a giant dog with a tiny woman in her purse.
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: My GF's anti aging cream went bad. HOW DOES ANTI AGING CREAM HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE?!