@Squirreljustice: I'm wearing a burqa, fencing mask, & a welding helmet while reading a book on cannibalism & an old lady on the bus still wants to chat.
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@Tmoney68: So, Facebook is celebrating its 10th birthday. What do you buy for the social media app that makes you hate everyone?
@iLikeCatShirts: Oprah says we all have a small child inside of us longing to get out & omg why isn't anyone talking about Oprah eating children?
@3sunzzz: [Thanksgiving Dinner] "Ursula, would you mind saying grace?" "I'd be honored. Let us join hands and bow our heads. WAIT FOR IT...grace."