@FeralCrone: I'm wearing black with navy blue today. Fight me. Any bruising will only serve to tie it all together.
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@thepunningman: Police: Cover me Rookie: ok [pulls out guitar] Every little thing she does is magic
@abbycohenwl: Me: I know panty hose are a little dated but I love how they even out my skin tone Bank Teller: So is this not a robbery? Me: No, It is
@ObscureGent: The best way to get the woman of your dreams is to comment "gorgeous" on a minimum of 52 of her selfies.
@Chumpstring: GENIE: u have 3 wishes ME: give Taylor Swift 1 extra ear GENIE: k ME: a blue one GENIE: righto ME: now make Kanye hear out of it GENIE: dude