@illTortuga: I'm worried my dog will never find out who's a good boy.
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@StatusInBeirut: If you think being a vegetarian will make you thin, I direct your attention to cows.
@causticbob: I recently got a tattoo with Chinese symbols that reads, "I don't know. I don't speak Chinese." Then when people ask me what it means...
@jergarl: Me: IT'S TIME TO SETTLE DOWN FOR THE NIGHT 8yo:*starts playing accordion M: Where did you even get that? 8:*making eye contact* No idea.