@KKAlThani: Imagine a shark eating pizza. Imagine you were frog. Imagine a donkey wearing a skirt. Imagine someone telling you to imagine stupid things.
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@Playing_Dad: Cop: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND Me: I didn't do... Cop:*cuffing me* Dispatch, we have a creepy clown in custody Me: These are my regular clothes
@thenatewolf: ME: Detectives on tv always take people to diners to ask them questions. DETECTIVE: [sighs] ME: Maybe a few pancakes would jog my memory.