@Vodkantots: Imagine falling in love with someone and then discovering that he has faith in humanity.
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@longwall26: No self-respecting murderer is going to have the patience to stand there for the twenty or thirty hours it'll take me to dig my own grave.
@SteveSuckington: I wonder how many hobbies you have to suck at before you take up bird watching.
@Nursey2Be: Women are like bacon: we look good, we smell good, we taste good and we will slowly kill you.
@SteveDutzy: FUN PRANK: Bump into Kanye in public, pretend you don't recognize him, and say "EXCUSE ME ORDINARY CITIZEN" Then watch how mad he gets.