@garrettbarry70: Imagine meeting the girl of your dreams and then finding out that she eats spaghetti with a knife.
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@TheMichaelRock: Me: Now what's the rule, son? 11yo: *sighs* If his first album came out after 2000, I can't call him a rapper. Me: You're learning...
@WritePlay: *Santa's Google search* cheap labor cheap labor not kids magic cheap labor elf for sale bulk labor laws by country north pole group travel
@Bob_Heller: I love breakdancing. I don't do it... Or watch it, even. I just like it because it allows be to sell cardboard to rich white kids.
@NikiWithIssues: I hit a parked car today so naturally I left a note. It said "Die, Decepticons! Die!"