@TweetPotato314: imagine when the stars that make orion’s belt die and his pants fall down
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@GrantTanaka: me: so what, you're gonna be angry at me for the rest of your life wife: no, the rest of yours
@truegritrumble: All I do is answer emails all day. I don't care whose emails. If I see an email, I answer it. No open computer is safe. My family is worried
@Wtftab: Useful information: don't turn around if a woman throws a shoe at your back. Because more than likely the other one is in mid flight.