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@Michael1979: Important notice I stuck on a bench in the park today.
@upsidedowntrash: I get home and realize where my house stood a shark now sits dressed as a house with its mouth open
Shark:[nervously makes house noises]
@lakeanagirl: How do you say "bra" in German? Stopsemfromfloppin
@UncleDynamite: sistine chapel
@Scdavis24: Apparently it was a bad idea to ask Siri "What do women want?"
She's been talking nonstop for the last two days now.
@TheTweetOfGod: "Miley Cyrus: 'Society Wants to Shut Me Down'". Not down, Miley. Up.