@exitingcorpse: in australia we call her kilometrey cyrus
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@AndRyanTF: I just took such a long hot shower that when I finished, Captain Planet was standing in my bathroom with arms crossed shaking his head at me
@shariv67: Him "You run like a gazelle." Me "I'm graceful?" Him "No. You'd be easy prey for a mountain lion."
@ProdigyNelson: [1st time buying drugs] Me: can I get a *reads smudged notes on hand* married iguana Guy: *opens coat to reveal married iguanas* Me: hell ya