@MattMcC1: in canada if you pat your pockets to show a hobo that you have no change and he hears your keys jingle, you have to give him your house.
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@ninjadinosaur1: I dunno Discovery Channel, if you think crabs are the deadliest thing you can catch, you've obviously never slept with my sister Ashley.
@ComedicBust: Role playing is fun, but I'm starting to wonder why my girlfriend will only let me dress up as my brother Randy.
@Petote: My fish makes so much noise during the night that I wake up six times a night to ask him if we are fighting
@ohthatbadger: They agreed upon 'almond milk' when the original name – flavoured nut water – was rejected by test audiences, for whatever reason…