@RatBatallion: In Canada, Miles Davis is known as Kilometers Davis.
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@djdarrellripley: It's true. Parents that use drugs, have kids that use drugs. So, there's an important lesson here... Don't have kids.
@usermcuserface: Cop: Turn around Me: Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round. Cop: Turn around! Me: Every.. *gets tased*
@Quartzjixler: The cashier wasn't impressed with my top hat, sash, and monocle until I said "Keep the change" from the $1 I gave him for my $0.95 purchase.