@iAmDelFreaky: In elementary I got all the chicks because my box of crayons had a built-in sharpener. Been on a dry spell ever since. Just me & my crayons.
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@Chumpstring: [used car] ME: my credit's bad SALESMAN: k ME: i'm a criminal SALESMAN: no law against that ME: i'm on the run SALESMAN: then you need a car
@flaskofwhiskeyy: Whoever said "out of sight, out of mind" has never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.
@AmishPornStar1: The people who came up with all these different rules for pluralization are bunch of peni.
@rodtopia: I once dated a woman who thought windmills were solar powered. I'm so glad I don't drink anymore.