@English_Muffin: In my defense, it was a fantastic idea at 3am...
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@le_buns: *reheats leftovers from yesterday's dinner date* *takes bite* *waiter from last night knocks on window* "how's everything tasting folks"
@aka_fatman: Yesterday, I told my son about the Tooth Fairy. Today, I find 33 teeth under his pillow. Clearly they are not his. I am very, very afraid.
@VerifiedDrunk: I'll die fat, drunk & happy while you live healthy until you get run over by a bus... See ya at the cemetery!