@NotJPo: In my house there are 5 females, 9423 pony tail holders, 49 bottles of nail polish, 8 justin bieber posters & 1 very patient, worn down man.
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@mauleePillar: My toddler appears to know a magic spell to transform any space into a Hoarders episode.
@sammyrhodes: I don't speak button, but if I could I'm pretty sure the button on my jeans is saying, "Aaaaah! Help me!" right now.
@Reverend_Scott: [hospital] "The results are in. I'm afraid you have Bad Priorities Disease. You have 1 month to live." But does my hair look good?
@somecleverthing: Plagiarism is bad? Change a few words, that shit is yours. It's like when you change a baby's clothes- new baby. New baby that's yours now.