@NotJPo: In my house there are 5 females, 9423 pony tail holders, 49 bottles of nail polish, 8 justin bieber posters & 1 very patient, worn down man.
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@philyuck: Horse-drawn carriages are pretty cool but the horses should learn to draw other stuff
@radtoria: 1st baby: you make sure he's breathing every five minutes 2nd baby: someone replaced him with a ham in the crib and you don't even notice
@BGH70: There's a guy in this Taco Bell bathroom stall so loud I'm not sure if it's performance art or a solstice goat sacrifice.
@hammbone84: Turns out that my wife isn't very fond of me referring to her period tracker app as the Countdown to Armageddon.