@Mikecanrant: In my most recent study, Ive found that saying "I'll have a chicken pot pie, extra pot" to KFC employees gets a laugh 4 out of 10 times.
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@birbigs: Alright. It's Sunday. Another Breaking Bad. Or if you don't watch the show, an hour of confusing tweets.
@thenatewolf: WIFE: You kept screaming “no, no, no, no, no” in your sleep. What were you dreaming about? ME: a well balanced diet and exercise
@Piecezilla: The weatherman said it's nice outside. I guess they don't let him watch the rest of the news.