@Lisa_Laughs_: In order to prepare for the future, I'm going to practice wearing adult diapers. But only when I'm drinking.
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@PS_IRuddYou: Just drove past a new typewriter repair shop... That's not a front for anything illegal I'm sure...
@BlindChow: [crime scene] ROOKIE COP: but why would a chicken kill himself? DETECTIVE: *lowers shades* to get to the other side *rookie cop vomits*
@stockejock: What do we want? ROCK HARD ABS! When do we want them? THE DAY AFTER THE HOLIDAYS ARE OVER!
@KyleMcDowell86: [Sees girl watching Star Wars] "Oh I love that movie, the way" *starts to sweat* "All those stars are at war with each other"