@shutupmikeginn: In order to save space, Ricky Gervais & Seth McFarlane are both one guy now. Frankly, it's been a long time coming
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@QwertyJones3: Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I just want a girl who gets at least 100 likes on every selfie.
@CountOnVic: Kanye deleted all the slander like we didn't have an hour to grab screenshots and make power point presentations
@lloydrang: Will I. Am's headstone will read "Will I. Was," completing history's longest set-up to a punchline
@iamspacegirl: [At the Rumble] her *aggressively taking off earrings and heels* me *desperately trying to find somewhere to set down my ice cream cone*