@TweetsByTheTony: In pretty sure my wife's most prized possession is her plastic bag full of other plastic bags.
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@bornmiserable: "I don't know who you are, but I will find you and I will kill you and - oh sorry, wrong number." - Liam Neeson in Mistaken
@WetzelGeek: I knew this neighborhood was classy enough for me when I saw there is a "Pregnant Only" parking spot in front of the Liquor store.
@Contwixt: Went to get coffee for a coworker. I effed up the order, but used it as a teaching opportunity to illustrate the dangers of outsourcing.