@realHamOnWry: In recent years the number of UFO sightings has dropped because of the smart phone. Their users never look up.
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@Reverend_Scott: Fun Fact: The human brain isn't able to register typos or grammar errors until after hitting teh Send button.
@armyVet1972: I call my wife the iNag because she has 32GB of complaints and they're set on shuffle.
@briangaar: At this point, I'm pretty sure the main reason Donald Trump ran for president was to get more Twitter followers
@JennyPentland: "When you fall in love it burns and you die, right?" Yes, son. Love is terrible. "No Mom, I said LAVA." Oh. You maybe can survive that one.