@CelebrityChez: In retrospect, "so I guess we would all look the same if we were made into sausage" was probably weird small talk for a funeral.
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@AmericanGent69: Me: Excuse me Father, what's the Wifi password? Priest: We're in Church! Me: Oh I'm sorry. What's the Wifi password, Amen.
@FauxFawx: [on a date with a caribou as a favor to my sister] me: so...did you like the movie? caribou: *knocks over candy display & tramples 3 kids*
@Sickayduh: A sitar solo so complex and mind melting that the one guy who knows what a sitar is claps