@faisaladam_: In Soviet Russia a bar walks into men. The case of the man-killing-bar remains unsolved.
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@UnderTheJewFro: If someone ever challenges you to a fight, pull your pants off and chase them crotch first. I'm currently undefeated with this method.
@DoreyZoe: My next door neighbour just accused me of stealing clothes from her washing line. I nearly shit her pants