@Shock_Monster: In the time it took me to RT in Favstar I could have written the tweet in calligraphy and hand delivered it to all 7600 of my followers.
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@KyleMcDowell86: *buys roofies, slips then into girlfriends drink, plays video games for 8 hours straight in peace and quiet*
@underchilde: If I tell you I'm "breaking out the fine china," I just mean the expensive paper plates.
@ChickenFrecklez: Crazy sister put: "I had a child very young so I had to mature quickly" on her resume once. Put her email address as MONKEYTUSHIES87 too.
@SgtButtCheeks: I once knew a brother so smooth he wore a bluetooth in each ear and held the exact same conversation with 2 separate women at the same time