@Shock_Monster: In the time it took me to RT in Favstar I could have written the tweet in calligraphy and hand delivered it to all 7600 of my followers.
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@aparnapkin: I realized taking dogs for walks is basically their way of checking social media. One lap of smells is a newsfeed scroll. Peeing is posting.
@MattMcElaney: 10 years ago parents were like "be careful what you put on the web" and we were all "lol. old people." now none of us can ever be President.
@NicestHippo: Mr. Jones, did you or did you not have an affair with the victim, Diana? "No!" Oh really. And what's your first name? "Indiana" [jury gasps]