@JohnLyonTweets: Instead of a happy ending the masseuse gave me an indie movie ending. She stopped suddenly at a random point and left everything unresolved.
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@Madrass_badsass: I don't friendzone people. I relationshipzone them. Want to be friends? Too bad we are dating.
@scarfdud: my 80yr/o grandma is on facebook & she is a living click-bait article, she didn't even tell me what to do with it
@_Awwsomeness_: Falling in love is like Falling Ketchup from a Bottle. At first slowly, and then all at once. *The fault in our Jars*