@BuffaloHomo: Instead of being frustrated that you only have a 140 character limit just be thankful that I do.
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@causticbob: I bought a book on eBay called, 'How to scam on eBay'. That was two months ago, and it's not arrived yet.
@specialhug: People ask me the secret of a good tweet. It's called "proof-reading". Perhaps you've hard of it
@chuuew: ME What's a penguins favourite relative? Aunt Arctica! PENGUIN . . ME [makes flies over head motion] PENGUIN I don't know what that means