@hamspamtymaam: Instead of chasing after Taylor Swift, I'm just going to wait until she breaks up with everyone else so I'm all that's left.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@thegreatnanak: Brain: I see you're trying to sleep. Let me ruin your night by playing your worst memory from high school.
@danjan13: Kindly respect my midwestern lifestyle and do not make any crude or irreverent jokes at this time.
@chimneyspotter: DR: Are you sexually active? ME: Very DR: Eating donuts alone in your car doesn't count ME: Still yes DR: Neither do croissants ME: Then no