@GloriaFallon123: Instead of going to couples therapy, married people should just join Tinder and see what a nightmare single people have to deal with
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@Laser_Cat: Alfred: *placing pancakes in the shape of the Bat Signal* Here are your pancakes, Master W- Bruce: They're Batcakes Alfred. Say "Batcakes!"
@BoomBoomBetty: If a neighbor rolls up in a golf cart to your new house, he’s either the really fun neighbor or he’s your new HOA overlord.
@rantingmd: getting sick of watching movies where johnny depp dresses like a hobo. I blame him for russel brand
@SocialustGal13: Let's make a deal. You sing Christmas music in the office and I'll leave 5 minutes early to let the air out of your tires. Deal?