@TheSharona06: Instead of smiling and nodding through a conversation, try clapping and nodding. People will stop talking to you.
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@GringoBrulee: Wife: wtf is this pile of clothes doing on the floor? Me: I struck down a Jedi. W: god I hate you. M: yes, use your hate
@TheMichaelRock: Me: Quit talking down to me like I don't know shit about technology! 12yo: Sorry... Me: That's ok. Now fix the router.