@joeljeffrey: Instead of walking faster when someone holds a door open for me, I slow down to test their door holding resolve.
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@MollySneed: [puts a tub of Blue Bell in the cart] Ma'am, did you hear there was a recall? That could be deadly. [slowly puts second tub in cart]
@bridger_w: When I die, instead of being cremated or buried, I'd like my body to be thrown out of a tree onto a group of teens