@michael_raphone: INTERVIEWER: under skills you've listed "gets jokes" ME: haha, very good. good one sir, haha
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@RacesTacoTrucks: Alarm clocks would be much more effective if instead of a snooze button they just released bees.
@ImJESSPlayin: Maybe, "only if you're taking me to dinner" wasn't the best response to, "is this going down?" to the guy on the elevator. Flirting is hard
@TheToddWilliams: [office party, 1842] Ralph Waldo Emerson: The only gift is a portion of thyself Me: Look Ralph, the rules to Secret Santa were very clear