@PoliUncorrect: Interviewer: we need someone experienced, this job will break you... Worm: (slowly breaks itself in two while maintaining eye contact)
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@StarWarsProblms: Leia: This is romantic Han: I know Chewie: Rwwar Leia: Does he have to be here? Han: It's a life debt. You're basically marrying us both
@deardilettante: [ brings ouija board to your grave ] "Okay, now will you tell me why her number was in your phone?"
@FuckabillyRex: I gave my bus driver a copy of the play I wrote about a bus driver that falls in love with one of his passengers. And now we wait.
@misfarber: Anthropic principle: the universe must be as it is in order for us to perceive it Anthropomorphic principle: look, I'm a talking principle!