@letschillyo: iPhones need a feature where an incoming call doesn’t take up the whole screen so u can do other things while u ignore a phone call
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@Bob_Heller: Party Tip: At a 3-year-old's birthday party, you can piss all over the bathroom. ALL OVER!!!! Nobody will suspect you.
@Sassafrantz: [stops during sex] If you spin my fanny pack around, there's sandwiches in there. Help yourself.
@PortRooster: Due to a tragic "iTunes on shuffle" incident, I have had to convince the guys at work that I have a 12yr old daughter they have never met...