@Jack_Wagon1: Ironic... is having a coke machine reject your dollar bill for it being rolled up to many times.
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@AndyRichter: Fun to hear newscasters, while their chopper hovers over an active crime scene, scold people "the last thing the police need is spectators"
@writerPT: I'm married, but not "pass up the opportunity to sleep with Thor" married. Or Wolverine. Or Captain America. Or Jennifer Aniston...
@PaperWash: Giving someone a Dunkin Donuts gift certificate for their birthday is the perfect way to say "I love you" and "I hate you" at the same time