@somecleverthing: Irrational fear 807: being spoken to by a comedian during their performance. I would die a thousand proverbial deaths and a single real one.
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@nbadag: [me at 22] in a hurry, better run up this flight of stairs [me at 32] i threw out my back because the toaster startled me
@HatfieldAnne: A brightly-colored van drives slowly down our street. Kids gather excitedly. It is the Edible Arrangements truck. We are all betrayed.
@TheSharona06: When taking your dog to the vet it's very important to remember to put your dog in the car.