@MartaEffing: Is it possible to divorce someone twice? Not re-marry and divorce again, but divorce twice so you're completely done. Like, extra divorced.
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@justabloodygame: *singing scales* Do, Re, uh... *calls Lionel Ritchie* "Hey" Hello! "What comes after Do & Re on a music scale?" Is it Mi you're looking for?
@SSgtTommyD: My daughter has an ice skating date with her boyfriend tonight. So I'll be the guy skating behind two 12 year olds carrying a shotgun.
@lecalabara: I was holding the door for an Asian guy and he said "sank you." So I punched him. Cant believe that he brought up Pearl Harbor lke that