@Thedudish: Is it true animals can sense danger? The cat's been wearing a helmet all week, and it makes me nervous.
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@FKACornshucks: This one time, a work colleague declared The Avengers to be a better film than The Dark Knight. That was a busy day in HR, I can tell you.
@AimeeHelene1: Just watched a guy walk into the wall, because he couldn't decide if he should go left or right. The future of humanity scares me.
@goodhairperson: [murder occurs] ME: how terrible. why can't we love each other [someone slightly inconveniences me] ME: I will execute your entire family