@mathtermind: Is the female equivalent of a douchebag a douchebaguette?
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@WritingWilkie: The most embarrassing moment of my life was when I called my teacher "mom" during sex.
@murrman5: is your name melissa? "yes" are you married? "to you sadly" yes or no please "yes" do you like the lie detector I bought for your birthday?
@ericsshadow: [undercover FBI agent steps out of his surveillance van, knocks on my front door] do you ever stop eating?
@hansabumsadaisy: #RubbishJokes My girlfriend told my that she wanted peace and quiet whilst cooking. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm.